Chapter 4: Married

 

Why yes... I do have earrings in that picture. Two on the left and one on the right. If I were any cooler, my stuff would freeze. 

It is 2004. We are engaged and planning our wedding. And I use the term "we" loosely. If you know my wife, you know she was the epitome of style. And my girl could have planned the invasion of Normandy. She planned the wedding from top to bottom. The dress, the flowers, the reception, the church. I still consider myself lucky that she told me when to show up and what to wear.

The thing I remember the most about getting married was finding a church. We were not churchgoers nor where we very religious. Cyndi and I shared a belief that we don't know what awaits us in the great beyond and not knowing was OK with us. Something that has been present on my mind a lot over the last few days and weeks.

But no one would marry us. Every church we contacted said no. I wanted her to get married in a church. She deserved that, and her family deserved that. Her grandmother deserved to give her away in a church. We finally found a church that was willing to marry us, but before the would commit they wanted to interview us. I guess in some way to find out if we were marriage material, as if they would call it off if we failed their tests. I clearly remember the pastor asking us why we wanted to get married. I admit I was a bit offended by the question and I probably gave some jerk response. Hindsight would have me answer that question differently.

"I want to get married because this woman is my person. She is bound to me and I am bound to her. We want to make a family and to make a life that would be worthy of any church. I will love her with my whole heart for as long as I am."

I don't know that pastor's name. But I would like him to know that the couple he married, that cold January day, was married for 17 years. They made beautiful babies together, and they made each other very happy.

Back to the story... Once we finally nailed down the church, all that was left was to get married. I will save the story of the bachelor party for another time, but ask me... It is pretty good. And don't worry no one was harmed or irreparably damaged.

We got married on January 29, 2005. A date that I would forget every year. One year we were talking about going out to dinner for our anniversary and I was sure it was Jan 25. Again... I am so lucky she could see past my flaws. As you would expect, it was cold that day. It snowed that day, not a lot but enough for us all to notice. I was sitting outside before the ceremony with one of my groomsmen and we remarked on how cool it was to watch the snow fall on our ceremony.

I was really nervous about the service. I remember being terrified I would say the wrong name. You may recall that famous Friends episode where Ross says the wrong name at his wedding. I had gotten that into my head and like a bad dream, I couldn't quite shake it. I was back behind the wedding arch, in the pastor's office with my best man. He kept pointing out how nervous I was. I just wanted everything to go right for her.

When the ceremony started, I got all choked up. Knowing how much of a "softy" I have become I should have seen that coming, but I didn't. It was almost like an out of body experience. The pastor could have said anything, and I would have repeated it word for word. "Eric do you take this woman, to beat you about the head and neck from this day forward?". "I do". I don't remember what, but I do remember the pastor screwed something up. I remember it diffusing the tension. And just like that... "You may kiss the bride!".

The reception was small. Several people didn't come because the weather wasn't perfect. I still remember the people who didn't come. And no... I have not forgiven them. We entered the reception to Blur, "Song 2".  "Woo Hoo"!!!

Like I said the reception was small, but I remember having so much fun. Both my grandmas out on the dance floor dancing to "Hey-Ya". I told the DJ not to play country, and 5 minutes in he plays Cotton-Eyed Joe. 

Her stepmom and dad asking us if we were going to start a family right away. I thought "let's let them put the buffet away before we start making babies". They surprised us at the reception by paying the rest of the bill. Such a nice gesture, one I never forgot.

We didn't eat, we were too busy walking around shaking hands and collecting hugs. Cyndi had made chocolate dipped fortune cookies and put them on all the tables. At the end of the night it was the only food left. She and I walked around gobbling up these cookies. It was a tradition she often repeated on our anniversaries. Chocolate dipped fortune cookies for the win.

Mr. and Mrs. Stary would spend the next 17 years together. That pastor should be proud, he married a winner.

Next Chapter... Making babies... well... having, I will keep making to myself.